I had always been an unwanted child since I was young.
My mother worked as a maid in the castle, so since childhood, I was taken care by my aunt who lived in the castle town. I don't have a father. When I was younger, I heard something about my father, but it was left aside.
"You're really ugly. Go draw water so I don't have to see that face."
It seemed that my aunt hated my face, I was often told to do works outside the house.
My aunt and her husband had two boys and one girl of the same age as me. They're Jido, Bado and Kuku.
Jido disturbed me by kicking me when I was just about to pull the water from the well.
Bado tripped my feet when I was carrying the bucket.
I was usually cautious toward them, but I didn't see their figures today, it was a failure.
Since the water splashed onto soil, I had become full of mud.
"Yay, muddy Lulu."
"Hehen, mud make-up looks better than your normal face y'know~"
I wept as I was more vexed that I couldn't deny them more than getting myself muddied. It was a fact that people were gentler to me when I was covered with mud and my face couldn't be seen than when I was just simply soaked.
When I was washing my body near the well, Kuku came. She was with her usual sarcastic friends.
"Ara? What a waste of your special make-up."
"Right right, wouldn't it better if she wear mask anyway?"
"That's good! Kuku, you're a genius!"
The girls weren't using violence like Jido and Bado, but their words hurt me all the same. At a time like this, I wonder how would Arisa retaliate? If it was Tama-chan, she would likely throw mud balls toward those girls for their own make-up.
It was generally like these during my childhood.
◇
When I was 9 years old, my mother took me to the castle together with her. I was to be the princess's playmate. It seemed that the fourth queen's daughter was quite a sickly person. Moreover, she was really hard to please, noble daughters couldn't keep her company for more than three days, so they turned to me.
Normally, for a commoner like me to meet a princess, I would have to take etiquette lesson for about a year first, but it seemed they gave up in 2-3 days, so the lesson was abbreviated.
"It's Lili's daughter this time? Mou, I've said many times that I don't need playmates, if they insist, then bring me a scholar or a bureaucrat instead."
What I heard from the other side of the door was a child voice with tired and proud adult words that didn't suit it. I'm not welcomed here either after all.
The princess that I met for the first time was a very beautiful girl with mysterious violet hair and pupils. Furthermore, her eyes were really calm like an adult.
Pushed by my mother, I awkwardly introduced myself, the princess glanced at me and then briskly stepped toward me and push up my bang. I always covered my ugly face with a bang so it wouldn't be seen.
I prepared myself for the abuse that the princess would throw at me. But the abuse was different from what I expected.
"Cih, this riajuu face, winners have it all since they're born."
"Arisa-sama, even though this girl can't be said to have superior look, she's a good girl that's calm at her age. Please don't hate her."
Riajuu face? I've never heard those words.
Arisa-sama leaned her neck to the side after hearing my mother's word and murmured, "Poor look?" That's the kindness of a mother. She couldn't really say that her own daughter was ugly.
"What are you saying? Lili. If you tell me that this bishoujo face is poor, that'd mean this country doesn't have any beauties you know?"
At this time, I had thought that Arisa's words were an indirect sarcasms, but she told me later that she was serious.
Thus, I became the playmate of the princess.
◇
The princess that I served was a slightly strange person.
She ordered the servants to cultivate a field on the castle's garden, and she went inside the library and treasure vault in the castle to read many difficult books. Even though she made her unusual clothes herself, she couldn't do embroidery or knitting, she had many imbalances like that. Moreover, she was also not good with social dancing and poem reciting.
"Did you look at the new playmate of the taboo princess?"
"I saw I saw, what's with that ugly girl."
"Hey, they'll scold you if you say that."
I heard such backbiting from the the maid's room. It seemed that taboo princess was about Arisa. Looked like, those violet hair and pupils were considered to be bad omen.
I didn't tell about it to anyone, but the women were gone in the next day. The princess said, "Fufun, it's impossible for malicious gossip to skip my sharp ears." It seemed there was a magic tool to hear far sounds, it was called voice pipe.
At the following day, princess Arisa told me a children story called "The Ugly Duckling".
Princess Arisa had told me many stories, but I liked this story the most
I wasn't as naive as to think that I would become like the swan in reality, but I thought I was allowed to dream a little.